I stared ahead as the hall erupted into applause for the students on stage. My last day in this place—this hell they so fondly called a college. I wondered if I had ever truly belonged here, and the answer stared right back at me, merciless and final: no.
The ceremonial attire clung to my skin like a curse; the air itself felt thick, suffocating. Just five minutes. Five more minutes.
I turned slightly to my left, my gaze drifting aimlessly—and then I saw him. Once upon a time, he had been my everything. God, the extremes I had gone for him. But now, looking at him from this quiet distance, I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing.
People say you heal from heartbreak, that you eventually move on. But all I felt was numbness.
Was it hurting? No.
Did I want it to? Yes.
Because pain meant I cared. Pain meant I was still alive. But all I could see now were the demons I had fought for him—for a man who, at the end of the day, was only human. A man who thought he was better than everyone else.
Maybe he was never actually at fault. Maybe it was simply that my past self could not endure the weight of the things I can hold now.
It was the pain that made me real. That carved out the human in me.
As if sensing my gaze, he tilted his head slightly, eyes catching mine. He offered me a small, gentle smile. God—he was so painfully real, so genuinely kind, that it almost hurt to look at him.
He had been everything I ever wanted, and yet he had kept us firmly, stubbornly, in the realm of friendship. He never crossed that invisible line—because he was still trapped in his own past, his own damage, his own trauma.
I looked at him and remembered us four years ago. Same hall, same lights, same suffocating energy. Back then, it was the fresher’s party; now, it was graduation.
I remembered seeing him for the first time—his pastel blue shirt neatly tucked into dark jeans, the softness in his eyes, that quiet mischief in his smile.
Did you guys know he’s painfully shy around girls?
And suddenly, the truth settled inside me like a confession I had always known:
He was never the villain. I made him into one.
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